Proof that this is correct: the ABOVE AVERAGE ponytail is the easiest to construct and is only used to keep hair out of your way there for it is used by people who are not overly concerned with their looks and care more about being able to complete a task without all their hair getting in the way. The AVERAGE ponytail is slightly harder to create due to the fact that you have to pay attention to how you pull back your hair a person using this hairstyle isnt practically dumb they merely spend more than 5 seconds on their hair these extra seconds indicate that they are not constantly obsessed with one thing all the time such as improving their intelligence. The BELOW AVERAGE ponytail while very similar to the average ponytail in concept (same theory of extra time spent on ponytail) is actually drastically different in practice the main purpose of the below average ponytail is to give it extra movement thus bringing extra attention to the ponytail this distraction is usually used to cover up other facts about the person such as their lack of intelligence (some allowance can be made during hot weather or the play of sports). The RETARDED ponytail is mostly signified by its inefficiency namely the fact that hair will get in your face if you even think about moving your head thus defeating the purpose of a ponytail furthermore the pain caused to your root hair can only be ignored by a person with a mental inability to realize pain. The THEORETIAL ZERO POINT ponytail completely defeats the purpose of a ponytail and beyond that youd have to be brain dead to be willing to go walking around with a pony tail that appears to be a failed unicorn horn so unless you a zombie please go to the nearest hospital so your basic care will be taken care of since you cant accomplish it yourself (any argument about the weather or heat are invalid at this point due to the fact that while your neck may be cooler your face will be melting into your neck). As to the question of SIDE PONYTAIL there is the one at the base of the neck very similar to the above average ponytail merely pulled to the front on one side this indicates AVERAGE intelligence do to the fact that it makes your neck and shoulders itch and may get in the way. Any SIDE PONYTAIL higher than that is between BELOW AVERAGE and RETARDED due to the fact that it is merely used to draw attention. A last note: EXTREME HEAT TURNS EVERYONE RETARDED